Pressure is Mounting on Women - Which Way is "Leaning In"?

Written by Amy Abbott:

Women are tiring of the struggle to have it all. We face under-employment and unemployment, strive for balance in work and life and seek equity in salary and benefits—but there's an internal battle that presents just as fierce a fight.

TheBump.com and ForbesWoman interviewed nearly 1,000 women, 67 percent of whom worked outside the home and 33 percent who stayed home with children, for its State of Parenthood and the Economy 2012 Survey. The survey found that women feel financial pressure to support their families. Nearly 70 percent of working moms surveyed said they feel pressure to work to bring in added income, and more than half (52 percent) of those surveyed feel pressure regarding how much time they devote to their child/children. And 44 percent of stay-at-home moms said their partner sometimes makes them feel they’re not pulling their own financial weight.

Whether we work in or outside the home, the pressure that we're neglecting or sacrificing some area of our lives seems to be mounting. With all these pressures on women, it's a wonder there is ever time to devote to career development, business backup and other practices necessary for the modern workplace. Maybe it's time we abandoned notion of "having it all" and devoted ourselves to pursuing that which provides us with personal and professional fulfillment.

 We spoke with three women about the lessons they've learned from their time in the business trenches. These entrepreneurs are improving their lives, professions and communities, and they have much to teach us.

Embrace Your Inner Entrepreneur to Advance in New, Unexpected Directions

Attorney and journalist Joanne Bamberger (pictured left), who works in the Washington, D.C., area, encourages women to channel their internal business acumen to take control of their own destiny. Bamberger discussed the changes she's seen in the business world since she started working.

“On one hand, things are better because more options are available to young women. When I was a broadcast journalist, it was highly unusual for women to be more than the weather girl. When I graduated from law school, there were plenty of women attorneys, but few partners.”

Bamberger, editor-in-chief of The Broad Side, continued, “While there are more opportunities open for so-called career reinvention, as we get older even reinvention is more difficult unless we are willing to strike out on our own and embrace our inner entrepreneur.” What works for Bamberger is an amalgam of writing, consulting and broadcasting. She often appears on television about women’s issues, including Melissa Harris Perry’s popular show on MSNBC. Bamberger was recognized in March with the Campaigns and Elections 2013 Award, for her work highlighting political power and her influence on women online in non-political spaces.

The Greatest Understanding Appears From the Worst Situations

Like Bamberger, business developer Jean Howell (pictured right) enjoyed several different careers and then developed her entrepreneurial spirit. In her job selling corrugated shipping containers and boxes, Howell worked with few women. She learned a valuable lesson there about attitude.

“There were only a handful of women in sales in our company, and two were in my office. The other woman was an aggressive and pushy person, who was probably that way for understandable reasons. She was about a decade older than me, so she had put up with all the abuse and negative behavior from men in the office for 10 more years than I had. The men in our plant were courteous to us as long as we were “womanly.” This saleswoman scared them, I’m sure, as much as she scared me. "She coped, I believe, by being somewhat of a bully. Nevertheless, she sold a lot of boxes.”

Both Howell and Bamberger stressed mentors, but noted that the movie-version mentor isn’t always there. Large corporations may include formal mentoring programs, but many women pick up their mentoring in whatever situations they can get it. You don't have to wait for a mentor to come along; there are many resources for women to help each other.

Role Models Are Everywhere

Millennial Carolyn Capern (pictured left), owner of a social media agency in Florida, admits to never having a formal mentor. Capern said she sought out mentorship in every area she felt she needed direction. Capern cited role model Regina Holliday, an unlikely teacher who was married to one of Capern’s American University professors. “My professor passed away from kidney cancer after a series of terrible medical events. Holliday turned his death into a mission of advocating for patients to have a voice in their own care."

Capern continued, “Mentors and role models both matter to me—be aware there are things you don’t know, seek out guidance when you need it, and build a trusting relationship that allows you to rely on their word.” Capern, who started her own company in 2011, hopes to mentor others.

Surprises Happen - Be Ready

All three women said relationships and connections were integral to their continued success. Capern recounted a chance encounter where she gained a new account by being at the right place at the right time. Capern and her partner stopped by a friend’s workplace to pick up concert tickets, and the friend asked if they knew about Wordpress. Capern said they did, and her friend brought the team in immediately to talk with co-workers. Her company secured a project on the spot. “To me, this demonstrates how those random connections are great in business.”

Learn All You Can

Capern’s strongest message goes to the new grad or the career changer. “Learn to code. This message is one I wish someone had told me before I started college. Coding is an incredibly useful skill right now." She added, “I don’t think I can express enough the importance of technology in today’s workplace." Master any technology fears you may have now through education.

All three women agreed that women need to engage their future. Bamberger said, “Really think about what energizes you. What are your particular talents? How can you use them to your best advantage? How can you make you and your family happy?

Amy Abbott is a writer, trained with "old school" journalism, wired into the digital world, familiar with best practices online and print, expertise in B2B and consumer health writing as well as travel, arts, and business. Newspaper columnist and book author, master’s degree in journalism. Amy can be reached at [email protected]